From Organised Chaos to Intentional: Introductory Post

This blog post is one of the very first few posts I published back when I had zero knowledge about blogging. I want to keep it here because it’s nice to know how far I get in my intentional living journey. You can certainly skip this introductory post if you like.

Go straight to How to make time for what matters or if you’re into Money Mindfulness, you can do that in 5 steps here.

Or you can continue reading to know a little bit more about my intentional living journey.

Here it goes.

My mission is to go from an organised chaos to being intentional.

This post is to give you a brief introduction about myself and the purpose of my blog.

Hello, and welcome to my little space in this digital world. I am so glad you are here. Having this blog makes my heart feel so grateful because finally, I found a creative outlet and a platform I can use to document my journey in creating an Intentional lifestyle.

Best part is, I get to share it with you.

I am E, I married to my wonderful husband R. We have been together since 2007 and have 2 beautiful children. Kuya who’s 11 and Miss M, 5 years old. She will be in Prep this year. I am excited for her.

You’ll get to know more about my little family as I publish posts and send weekly emails. if you’re into planning ( and taking action), you can download a free 2-page weekly planner here. You can also click the image below.

Image of Free Bujo Weekly Spread Printable

DISCLOSURE: Some of the links in this post are affiliate links of which I receive a commission if you click through and make a purchase at no additional cost to you. See my full Disclaimer here.

Photo Credit: All photos (except for books) are from Ivory Mix. This is my go to resource for Free and Paid Stock Photos.

“You are so Organised”

This is a common comment I get from my friends (and colleagues). I think because they only see my organised notebook and they think I have an organised home.

I appreciate that they take notice of how organised I am. And I’m grateful for this compliment. I really am, but sometimes I cringe deep inside.

It’s because whenever I get this comment, I get reminded that there are other areas of my life that need to be organised. Hearing compliments like this triggers my brain to think of all the other million things I need to do.

There are so many of them, they even come at me in my dreams.

But then I realised I am not really that organised.

my thought process looks like — This is how my mind and actions look like sometimes.

See those clips above? That’s a perfect representation of how my mind is (almost all of the time)

I have so many things I need to organise. And I want to be organised for real. as in for real for real.

At the moment I’ve got so many open-loops. In David Allen’s Book Getting Things Done, an open loop is something that’s not complete.

I have a lot of unfinished projects. Heaps of to be continued or “what’s next” type of thing

Surely, I can do better than this.

Often I feel like my brain is a computer that hasn’t been defragged. My thoughts are constantly entangled with each other I don’t even know what’s what.

Because of this, I always find myself in a constant motion of endless spiral of overwhelming chaos of thought. The emotional and mental clutter are too much it makes it hard to process anything.

So…… I procrastinate. Then chaos happens because I can’t keep up.

My brain tells me, I’m a human and I should feel I am doing enough.

But then part of me says, I should not be this hard on myself.

In spite of having many responsibilities personally and professionally, I need to accept that I cannot do everything. And I should give myself some grace.

But theres a big “but”. I want and I need to satisfy my want to feel organised. For my own sanity.

I do think that I can be organised with less overwhelmed and pressure. And that’s what I am going to figure out by living with intention.

That is what’s the true purpose of this blog.

How can I be truly Organised without feeling overwhelmed?

So how do I become more organised, for real with less overwhelm?

It’s the big question. Even though I can’t answer that completely, I have a few ideas. But of course I will only know if they work once I put them into action.

Porducitivity doesn’t make sense to me right now. I mean I feel productive but Im drained and exhausted all the time. So when I say it doesn’t make sense, I mean I’m not really sure if doing a lot or more has. point.

Some days, I feel so exhausted yet I feel like I have done nothing at all. It seems that I do a lot though. Most days, I feel like I’m constantly chasing my tail.

So this gives me a constant feeling of forever chasing my tail.

So, by maintaining this blog, I am hoping I can keep myself in check and eventually get to the point where I really want to be.

[Edited to note that I did. Read the Guide on how to be intentional. ]

This blog is a place where my Intentional Life Journey is. A space where I can freely share the learnings, my progress and my aspirations. And by doing so, I would like someone who resonates with this sentiment to learn and grow with me.

If that’s you, hang out with me. We got this.

I want to be Productive but not to hung up with too much hustling.

Before you continue…. just a quick note.

[Edited to add this helpful note: To avoid too much hustling while being productive, try being intentional with your time and you can learn how to prioritise your tasks]

Anyway.

Right now, I am kinda in between. I am productive but I’m not happy about it. I think I’m productive because I do a lot of things. But then it causes grief and frustration because I’m not sure If I really did a lot. And it makes me grumpy all the time. Not good.

Some days, I feel so exhausted and yet I feel like I have done nothing. I do a lot but it seems that my work doesn’t give me the result I wanted. It doesn’t make sense. It makes me feel like I am forever chasing my tail.A place where Intentional Lifestyle is. Where my daily actions are well thought and aligned with my bigger goals. The space where I am productive but I am not too hung up with Productivity.

Ok, Maybe I am just an Organised Chaos

My home is not an overly organised home. I mean I have 2 young kids so maybe that’s expected. One kid (M) who likes to be creative and mess is ok. And one kid who’s obsessed with being neat and tidy. (Kuya).

Husband R is organised, more than I am but he’s got collection of dvds, cds, rock tee shirts so if I tell him he is organised he won’t agree. But he is. His collections are neatly piled and he spend time weekly to make sure the collections are always under control.

As for me, I am organised in most areas of my life.

I always have detailed plan for my projects. I like doing things the best I can. However, depending on how much I have on my plate at a given time, things can easily turn into madness. As expected, it can lead to overwhelm then I feeling stuck.

So yes, you can call me an organised chaos at the moment.

That means my situation is a little bit complex and maybe a little harder than it should. Some parts are chaotic and madness but I’m still manage to make progress.

And this is what am trying to solve. I’m on a mission to find solution where I can be Productive but not too overhelmed (and pressured)

This is where I am now….

I work part time in my day job for 3 days. Been working in my day job for the past 7 years [yeah, I love this company]
I’m ok with my professional situation, I feel like I got it together in this part. But it’s my personal life that I need to fine tune.
I don’t know what I’m doing but even though I have 4 days where I don’t have to go to work, I still feel stressed by unfinished household tasks and projects.
Progress feels so slow and unsteady most weeks
I want to be more organised, and just a little bit of chaos (if that’s even possible).

So wish me luck.

[EDITED again] – Now 2022, almost 2 years since I published this post. My life is way, way better. I’m intentional, I’m fairly organised There’s still a bit of chaos here and there, but it’s manageable.

As a bonus, I was able to share some money mindfulness strategies, intentional productivity and intentional living.

The Dream that woke me up

Remember, I mentioned at the beginning, the open loops come at me even in my dreams? Let me share one from couple of weeks ago.

In my dream, I was about to die (morbid I know, right?).

I was negotiating my life with an old lovely guy. I can’t remember his face but I remember how I felt while talking to him. He seemed kind and loving.

In my dream, the feeling was so real.

Not that I have experienced near-death experience (thank God), but you know the feeling when you have to go somewhere but there are so many things to do but too little time? Something like that.

The feeling was so real. In my dream all I was thinking about was I won’t be coming back for real. I woudn’t see my family, my friends and I woundn’t finish all my projects.

So, I asked the man if he could give me more time to live a little longer. Even just 24 hours more would be great. I wanted to call my Mother. It was weird I know but aside from wanting to talk to my Mother, I was thinking about my lists.

Yep. I’m one of those serial list makers. I even have list for my lists.

The lovely guy happily granted my request.

He permitted me to live for another 24 hours.

Oh man I felt grateful but that was the shortest and fasted 24 hours.

I have vague recollection on what happened next except for the bits and pieces where I was in a meeting with one of the Coaches at work.

It was about a grand plan or some kind of a big project I’m part of. I was like, But I was gonna die in a few hours….

Then I woke up.

I woke up having the biggest realisation of all.

It dawned on me that I am not really as organised as I want to be. I was not ready for the unexpected.

Now, I am ready to move forward

Alright, my friends. I am ready to take the first step to Intentional Lifestyle.

I don’t know yet exactly how I am going to do it but I have more than enough to start.

At the moment, I have:

a desire to change for the better. Be organised for real
an intention to break away from any form of chaos/overwhelm and that is including mental clutter
the best tools ever: The Bullet Journal Method by Ryder Carroll and Getting Things Done the art of stress-free productivity by David Allen

Check out my post on How to be Intentional using the Bullet Journal Method.