How to create a New Habit and Stick with it

start with repetition not perfection — Small repetitive actions are the behaviours that will deliver your desired outcome

Hey Beautiful.

What do you need most right this moment?

I need a self-care habit in my system, a healthy body, and the power to balance everything on my plate at the moment.

I need to create a habit and I need to stick with it.

Those were the lingering thoughts I have been having in the past few days since I published the last week’s post. Self-care Ideas

I am on the second week of my Self-care Project. I have been trying to create a new habit of sleeping earlier than 3 am and boy it has been a little bit challenging.

Are you also someone who is creating a new habit at the moment? If you are, I hope this post helps you.

Last week, I wrote about Self-care tips as I desperately needed it myself. I shared 24 self-care ideas that will take care of the mind, body, and soul. I really felt good having the plan in place and all I really needed was to follow the plan. Sounds easy yeah? Unfortunately, it is not.

I realised that creating a new habit and actually sticking with it can be really challenging to most people, including me. So, I thought of creating a guide which I am excited to share with you.

Armed with the expectation that it is not going to be easy to break old habits and create new habits, I put together the ideas I learned from the book ATOMIC HABITS by James Clear and additional information I learned from TINY HABITS by Bj Fogg Ph.D.

I am going to share with you the simple steps based on what I have learned from those two amazing books. This guide and all the ideas I am going to share in this post will never replace the value of these two books but I hope this post will at least give you an immediate hand to start a new habit.

I highly recommend reading ATOMIC HABITS AND TINY HABITS as these books will ultimately help you get better in Creating New Habits and Changing Current Habits that don’t serve you anymore.

How to Create A Habit and Stick with it?

Know your “Why”. If you don’t have one, make one
Pick one habit for a week and stay focused
Track your progress
Level up like a gamer.
Reward yourself

I have read both ATOMIC HABITS and TINY HABITS but what I am going to share with you is mostly my take away from ATOMIC HABITS.

Before I explain each step, I would like to share with you first the key ideas I have learned from Atomic Habits. Why? Because it will help us establish the right mindset about habits.

And you guessed it. It always start with the right mindset.

I think you can tell already that I love lists and processes. Well, aside from those two, I am actually big on the right mindset too. Having the right mindset really helps to have reasonable control and the right perspective in what we do. So this is really important when we are working on any goal.

This doesn’t mean we will get everything right all the time but it does help to be in a better headspace while in the process of achieving our goals.

I could go on and on with a Growth Mindset but that is reserved for another post in the future.

For now, let me at least help you have a grasp of the ideas around creating habits in a few bullet points.

Key ideas on Creating new habits

Habits matter because they help you become the type of person you wish to be. We can change gradually, one habit, one week at a time.
Real change comes from the compound effect of hundreds of small decisions. Habits are the compound of interest in self-improvement. The effects of our habits multiply as we repeat them.
Focus on systems instead of goals. Goals are about the result you want to achieve, Systems are about the processes that lead to those results. Goals are good for setting direction and systems are best for making progress.
If you want to master a habit, start with repetition, not perfection.

Disclaimer: This post may contain affiliate links which means I earn a commission when you purchase using those links. See my full Disclaimer here.

Get yourself a copy HERE You can also check out my Recommendations Page. Most of the online shops are having Black Friday Deals so now is a good time to grab your copies of these books.

1. Know your “Why”,

But Why?

Because when we know our ‘whys”, we are likely to stay focused on what we are trying to achieve.

Our ‘Whys” and our Purpose will keep us together when we temporarily come across a setback while we are reaching for our goals.

Knowing why we do what we do will help us look past any challenges and keep an open mind to keep on keeping on. More to the point, it often increases the level of our motivation.

Having a clear statements on why we are doing what we do provides a strong foundation that will help us keep our momentum in all the phases we go through.

What’s my Purpose in Creating a new habit?

My ultimate purpose in creating a new habit of sleeping earlier than 3:am is to stay healthy. I am reasonably healthy but I could do better. Being healthier will enable me to do more of what I love (Like Blogging) while being present with family and loved ones.

I am not really the best when it comes to self-care. I can be too passionate about a task or a project at the expense of my health. Which is not ideal and pointless really.

Since starting this blog, I have slightly been bad with sleeping. I love this passion project so much that sometimes I don’t notice the time passing. So few times in a week I find myself wide awake working on the ideas I have in the wee hours of the morning.

On weekends I usually work on my website. I am learning as I go in terms of the technical side of blogging. So, whenever I figure out something that I didn’t know before it makes me really excited and motivated to do more. Before I know it, it’s already 3 am.

In the last two months, I even had two weekends where I didn’t sleep altogether. The first instance was when I worked Friday night at 10pm then I was still working until 10am the next day. The next one was worse. It was also a Friday and I worked until 2:30 pm the next day. That was so bad. That being said, I enjoyed every minute of it.

I really hope I can avoid having the 3rd “all-nighter” as what R calls it. We laugh about it now but deep inside I really wish I didn’t have to stay sleepless because I always have a choice. I also want to set a good example for Kuya and M.

The ultimate purpose though is being intentional. I need to find a healthy balance between health and a passion project.

2. Pick one habit for a week and stay focused

According to James Clear, the author of ATOMIC HABITS, “the process of behaviour change always starts with awareness. We need to be aware of our habits before we can change them”.

I am aware now that sleeping between 1 am to 3 am is not a habit I want to keep. So I am creating a new habit which is sleeping before 3am.

As for you, I encourage you to, pause and check what are your current habits? Which habit do you intend to keep and which ones would you like to create?

Then, pick the most important habit you want to create and focus on it for the whole week.

To keep our focus, we need to do the minimalist approach. Start with one habit for one week. Doing just one habit means it will be easier for us to actually practice the habit. We are more likely to follow through if we only have to do one thing instead of doing multiple things at a time.

Aside from being Focused, being Consistent is another factor that will contribute to our success with creating new habits. When we are working on a habit, consistency is very important. James Clear stated that a habit is a behaviour that has been repeated enough times to become automatic.

Few things to keep in mind in creating a new habit to stay focused and consistent

Start small and start with the easiest step. Remember the value of baby steps. Start slow and steady. Pick only one habit and practice that one habit for a week.

2. To make sure you will practice the habit every day, partner the new habit with the habit that you are already doing. This is also known as Habit Stacking. More of this in a bit.

3. To be consistent we need to stay motivated.

Remember the Goldilocks Rule. It states that humans experience peak motivation when working on tasks that are right on the edge of their current abilities. Not too hard. Not too easy. Just right.

So when you decide on actions that you need to do to create a new habit, make it not too hard and not too easy.

4. Habits paired with deliberate Practice equals Mastery. Having a system for regular reflection and review plays an important role in keeping your focus.

Helpful Formulas in Creating a New Habit

Implementation + Intention Formula

Implementation + Intention Formula

This is good strategy because it makes the intended action to be specific. It means we know exactly what we need to do, when we need to do it and where we need to do it.

I will (BEHAVIOUR) at a (TIME) in (LOCATION)

Let’s take the new habit I am creating as an example.

Current Habit : I often sleep between 1:00 am to 3:am daily and on weekend I don’t sleep sometimes.

New Habit: Sleep before 3am. ( Applying the baby steps principle, I am aiming to sleep any time between 1 am to 2:30 am. It is a big adjustment so I need to create a doable easy strategy.

NOTE: I also took an extra step and identified the reasons why I sleep so late. The reason why I sleep late is that I read e-books, I study, I do online courses and I also find that this time block is where my brain is most active.

So, I had to think of one step that is simple and easy for me to do to start because it is impractical to just decide to go to bed at 12am.

So using the above formula. I came up with below a commitment.

I will read a real book (behaviour) at 12:am (time) in the bedroom (location)

I know that ideally, technology should be off at least an hour before bedtime but unfortunately, it has not been a possible option for me. So, I would need to eliminate any activity that involves technology come midnight.

Reading e-books is one of the reasons why I sleep late so replacing it with a real book is a bit better because I don’t have to use technology.

This action is EASY and enjoyable for me so this should help.

All I need is to focus on this new habit and keep going. NOTE: I am going to update you halfway through the 6 weeks period.

Suggestion for you:

Pick just one new habit you want to create and try the Implementation + Intention Formula. Then, temporarily forget all the other habits you would like to create. Focus on just one habit for one week.

3. Track your Progress

Never miss twice - try to keep your habit streak alive

More words of wisdom from ATOMIC HABITS: “The first mistake is never the one that ruins you. It is the spiral of repeated mistakes that follows. Missing once is an accident. Missing twice is the start of a new habit”

It is also important to remember the value of the satisfying feeling of making progress. We can enjoy this feeling by having a tracker in place.

Ideas to track your progress

Digital App for Habit trackers. There are so many habit tracker apps on both Android and iOS. These apps work best if you are a digital kind of person.
You can also use your digital calendar as a tracker. I am using an Android phone at the moment and the calendar has a feature where you can put cute icons daily. If you have the same feature you can also just use that to track your progress.
If you are like me who prefer analog style of trackers, you can just use your calendar in your planner or your normal calendar. That will work too. I have my trackers in my Bullet Journal.

Another formula that I learned from ATOMIC HABITS is the Habit Stacking and the Habit Tracking Formula

Habit Stacking and Habit Tracking Formula

After (current habit) I will ( track my habit)

My Example :

After Evening Self-care ( current habit) I will update my Tracker in Bullet Journal (track my habit)

GENTLE REMINDER: a tracker is a tool to track your progress not to judge you or beat yourself up when you break the streak. Just move forward and start again.

4. Level up as if you are a gamer

I do realise that you may not be a gamer so please forgive me because I can’t really think of another way to put this idea better than using the gamer idea. I am not a gamer either.

During the lockdown, Kuya has been playing (Nintendo switch), and being a mindful boy when it comes to gaming time he frequently mentioned: “level up” at some point.

I remember one time he just casually told me that he would only focus on one level at a time even though he was excited with the next level up. He said, sometimes it takes a lot of time to pass the level so not thinking about the next level helped him master the current level.

That simple conversation gave me so much insight and I thought that actually make sense.

I thought of sharing this idea because I feel that we can apply the same mindset in creating a new habit.

We focus on one habit this week and if we remain consistent by the end of the week then we can “level up” and add another one habit.

This is where the Habit Stacking Formula comes in.

Habit Stacking Formula

“Habit stacking is identifying a current habit you already do each day, then stack a new habit on top of it”. This method was created by BJ Fogg as a part of his Tiny Habits program.

When you get used to this formula, it is amazing how you can actually stack one habit after each other and you can build it like a stair steps.

Example:

After I wash the dishes, I will refill the water pot

After I refill the water pot, I will refill the coffee machine tank

After I refill the coffee machine tank, I will wipe down the kitchen spaces

After I wipe down the kitchen spaces I will spray and wipe the table

After I spray and wipe the table, I will “quick sweep” the kitchen floor

After I “quick sweep” the kitchen floor I will mop the floor

And my friends, that is my habit stacking in the kitchen which I also call “Kitchen Reset” tasks.

It took me a few weeks to establish this routine but the habit stacking formula was a big help.

It sounds like a lot of jobs but we have a tiny kitchen so each task doesn’t really take too long to do. Except for dishwashing. It usually takes me 20 minutes or less

Just a quick note. Sometimes I don’t get to do them all. And that is ok. I just try to do them the next evening. The dishes, wiping kitchen spaces are nonnegotiable so I do them every evening but I am ok to skip mopping the floor if I need to do more important tasks.

5. Reward yourself

Let’s remember to reward ourselves and celebrate small wins.

My favourite choice for rewarding myself is doing what I love to do. So extended reading time or watching series with R. Not following my schedule is a “sometimes” reward as well.

In some cases I do splurge a little bit on something I like.

You reward, your call. You decide what your reward will be. You deserved it.

Best of luck in creating a new habit. We can do it.

Let me know how you go by leaving a comment below.

See you next week.

Much love,

How to create a New Habit and Stick with it